Monday, March 31, 2008

Opening Day

It was a fine day for baseball:

Not really.

But the baseball happened anyway, in spite of the weather. In spite of the fact that Torii Hunter was on the field wearing an Angels uniform. And in spite of the fact that the only Santana in the Metrodome was Ervin "The Other" Santana, also in an Angels uniform and most definitely not a certain two-time Cy Young winner who was SO VERY NOT THERE.

Torii got a standing ovation before the game, and he pointed into the stands and fist-bumped his heart. It was close, but I didn't cry.

And when I heard that a certain lefty for whom I once harbored certain unreasonably passionate feelings struck out eight for the Mets earlier today, I winced, but there were no tears.

I had a hot dog, My Ho kept score, I sang along with the Hormel Row of Fame song. And these new Twins--that speedy one, the one with the unfortunate ears, that guy with the unibrow, the one with the brother, and the pitcher with the big trousers? Well, they went ahead and won the game.

Here's hoping they can do it again sometime soon. Maybe even a few times.

That would be good.

Friday, March 14, 2008

More Hot Haiku Action

The full video is now on the Strib website, including another reading of mine by Joe Mauer.

(JOE MAUER!! **SQUEE!!**)

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Boof Said “Big Trousers”!

Last Friday, a call for spring training-themed haiku went out from Section 220.

My contribution, which I posted as “TwinsGoddess” (my old Batgirl moniker), was this:

Boof is thin, Livan
Is here ‘cuz someone has to
Wear the big trousers.


And here, direct from Fort Myers, is a dramatic reading of my original work, by none other than Boof Bonser himself.

I've only watched that video about seven thousand times.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

A package? For ME?

I received a very special surprise in the mail yesterday, from my exceptionally awesome cousin Tiffany in Seattle:
It's a Joe Mauer Dugout Doll of my very own!

I have yet to find out how he came to be in her possession in Seattle, but apparently the DemiGoddesses have been in on this one and did an excellent job of keeping it on the down-low.

At first, I put him in my bedroom, in between my official Doug Mientkiewicz limited edition Rapala fishing lure and the ball My Ho caught when we were at Safeco. But then he started to freak me out, so I had to move him to the living room.

Dude's got the CRAZY EYES.

Friday, March 07, 2008

Spring Training, *Now With More Butts!*

"TWINS 8, ORIOLES 7
at Fort Myers, Fla.
Thursday, March 6

Twins at the plate: Delmon Young drove in two runs with a single to right field in the first inning, part of a 3-for-3 day at the plate for the left fielder…

(Mr. Young. Hot.)

"...Minnesota rallied in the eighth inning on RBI singles by Jon Knott and Matt Macri."


(Messrs. Macri and Knott. Hott.)

Thursday, March 06, 2008

In the spring, a Goddess' fancy lightly turns to thoughts of hot guys in baseball pants.

TWINS 7, YANKEES 5
at Tampa, Fla.
Wednesday, March 5


…Delmon Young blasted a long solo homer in the second inning off the black batter's eye beyond the 408-foot mark in center field. Garrett Jones slugged a two-run homer in the fifth inning off the party deck in right field, his first of the spring…”


Delmon Young


Garrett Jones

Mee-YOW! That is more like it.

Monday, March 03, 2008

Here's Hoping They're Really, REALLY Good at Baseball



Mike Lamb







Adam Everett








Jason Pridie






Otherwise I'm going to be catching a LOT of games on the radio this season.

*Sigh.*